Cougaring
July 23, 2010 2 Comments
Welcome to another edition of Light Fridays
Don't let Chilli get a pass because she LOOKS younger than him.
Don't let Chilli get a pass because she LOOKS younger than him.
After watching Usher’s Behind the Music this week, I can’t help but think that a) Usher and Chilli are obviously still in love with each other and b) Chilli is a cougar. In the show, Chilli mentions that at the age of 22, she was fascinated about how cute Usher was at the tender age of 14. Of course, when he was of age they begin to date. But at what age does cougaring begin?
Most people associate cougars with being significantly older women that have loved, married, divorced and now preying on her son’s barely legal friends. But I think a cougar can be born at any age and way before a messy divorce. Some women just have a thing for younger men. The ability to mold a man and to be in control is intriguing and a lot more feasible at a young age. So my theory is that cougars are the women that have left a relationship they couldn’t control and seek to be in one that they set the rules. Or he could just be that fine. I don’t know.
But I do know when a reader, formspringed me inquiring if I would date anyone more than 5 years younger than me, my answer, in short, was no. For one, I am not usually in environments with people 5 years younger than me so the odds of me falling for a younger man are slim. Secondly, I encourage people to enjoy where they are in life. I don’t want to put pressure on him to rush this life process in an effort to appear mature or to be what I desire him to be. Life experiences are an important part of what we bring to relationships, and if you only have a few then we really don’t have much to talk about. Lastly, I know plenty of great men my own age that I see no need to go cruising The Yard to pick up babes. I’m good.
The Mocha Café 
So dear what’s the youngest man that you would date? In terms of years, no less than two years, three years? My friends and I have been doing a lot of hanging out lately, and when I tell you a lot of young guys have been approaching me, I mean a lot, and I’m like wth? Guys that are 21-26, all across the board…smh. I don’t know why, but we’ve found the young guys to be a bit more endearing, more affectionate, and more willing to date. I have dated a 22 year old, and I made the age a prob when we were talking, but in hindsight, he was really a great guy. Now, I’m dating a 24 year old and I would definitely like for him to have more life experience and that’s what I keep telling him, but when I tell you girl he is soooo sweet and sooo affectionate, then I don’t know what to do. Maybe Mr. Older Than Him will come along, maybe not. Until I figure it all out, I’ll just keep dating this young guy, and having fun in the process, lol! Love you and your blog!
First of all, thank you for the love and support. Second, I don’t have a specific range younger or older, I just know I am not in an environment with many younger guys. And like I have said the conversations I have had with younger guys they haven’t been though anything yet, which is okay for some but not me. But there are ALWAYS exceptions to the rule. And most important, my preference is just that, everyone is entitled to their own. So if he is treating you well, and you are enjoying yourself, then it may be enough to overcome the age difference.