How Big Does it Need to Be?
May 24, 2010 6 Comments
In a world of glitz and glam, it is hard to keep up with the quota set by multimillionaire celebrities. Not only does our labels need to match those of adored celebrities, but men are now feeling the pressure to also size up accordingly. With each new public engagement, the size of the diamond ring grows as to not be outdone by the previous proposal. However, those unrealistic expectations for the 15 carat pink emerald cut diamond rings have trickled down to the barely, recession-ridden middle class. New graduates that are ready to wed on entry level salaries, student loan debt in tow, now must have to tack on the weight and price to adequately propose to love of his life.
If you can't get me this then I'm not marrying you...loser!
So my question to the ladies is “how big does it have to be?” I am all for nice things- quantity without sacrificing quality. I understand that is hard to convince people your man is head over heels in love with you without the carats to prove it. However, for me the ring is a lifelong investment and not a onetime purchase.
Initially, I don’t even need an engagement ring. It is to show others, not for the bride to be. I will prefer for that money to go toward eliminating any debt before we enter a lifelong union. I much rather have a huge beautiful home- something that builds equity. A nice wedding ring is necessary but something reasonable and within the groom’s budget.
However, once we continue to grow as a union, the [conflict-free] diamonds will be added. Because I think the ring is a symbol of our lifelong commitment, then there will be time at different intervals to invest more into the wedding ring. For example, an additional band could be added for the 5 year anniversary. More diamonds will added for the 10 year and by the time we have been married 50 years the ring will be massive. But hell, by that point, I would have EARNED it and the ring will be a symbol of not only of the love shared but of the trials endured, sacrifices made, and the vows upheld.
The Mocha Café 
omg. i love it. for the first time in the 6 years we’ve known each other i agree with you whole heartedly. now you should go out and teach a class on this subject.
I’m sure this is the second time but thanks mr. james.
I like this. A marriage Merit system. Start off small and work up to something bigger. I think this is smart because you don’t blow $4.1 Milli on a Purple emerald cut diamond ring
because you fucked the hotel smut that straightens the rugs in the bathroomon a relationship that has not withstood the test of time yet. Then it gives you a physical way to show how your relationship has grown over the years.And I think you should archive this article since you got Mr. James to say he agreed with you on ANYTHING other than the sky being blue.
A marriage merit system- I am still processing that term but yes you don’t want to over invest prematurely!
We must be related or something because your view on this subject matter is very similar to mine. LOL! I think people get so caught up on “keeping up with the joneses” that they become consumed with superficial values. Bigger and more expensive does not automatically translate to best (nor more meaningful). I don’t want my man to feel like he has to “one up” the next couple. It’s not about what other people think. It’s about how much thought(not money) was put into something that is a symbol of our love and commitment to each other. An engagement ring would be nice but as stated, “huge beautiful home” would be better.
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