How Big Does it Need to Be?

In a world of glitz and glam, it is hard to keep up with the quota set by multimillionaire celebrities.  Not only does our labels  need to match those of adored celebrities, but men are now feeling the pressure to also size up accordingly.  With each new public engagement, the size of the diamond ring grows as to not be outdone by the previous proposal.   However, those unrealistic expectations for the 15 carat pink emerald cut diamond rings have trickled down to the barely, recession-ridden middle class.   New graduates that are ready to wed on entry level salaries, student loan debt in tow, now must have to tack on the weight and price to adequately propose to love of his life.

If you can't get me this then I'm not marrying you...loser!

So my question to the ladies is “how big does it have to be?”  I am all for nice things- quantity without sacrificing quality.  I understand that is hard to convince people your man is head over heels in love with you without the carats to prove it.  However, for me the ring is a lifelong investment and not a onetime purchase.

Initially, I don’t even need an engagement ring.  It is to show others, not for the bride to be.  I will prefer for that money to go toward eliminating any debt before we enter a lifelong union.  I much rather have a huge beautiful home- something that builds equity.  A nice wedding ring is necessary but something reasonable and within the groom’s budget.

However, once we continue to grow as a union, the [conflict-free] diamonds will be added.  Because I think the ring is a symbol of our lifelong commitment, then there will be time at different intervals to invest more into the wedding ring.  For example, an additional band could be added for the 5 year anniversary.  More diamonds will added for the 10 year and by the time we have been married 50 years the ring will be massive.  But hell, by that point, I would have EARNED it and the ring will be a symbol of not only of the love shared but of the trials endured, sacrifices made, and the vows upheld.